Reagan's pregnancy started out with morning sickness (more like all day sickness) and many emotions. I cried at inspiring, cute, funny, beautiful, sad or really... anything! The tears just flowed. My "morning sickness" would start in the middle of the night and last through the morning and afternoon. I had a hard time finding anything that sounded appetizing. Except for tuna. I always wanted/craved tuna fish with mayo. 🤣 I also liked pickles-typical. I didnt want many sweets and if I did I would rather have fruit pie or cheesecake rather than chocolate.
At around 14/15 weeks, my nausea went away and I started to feel more normal. The rest of pregnancy went pretty smoothly. I gained 50 lbs! The only thing that keeps me from getting sick is eating 😋
Reagan was not a big mover. She never kicked me in the ribs. She was quite gentle and calm. I remember worrying about her a few times thinking she should be moving more. But she was perfectly fine-just a calm, sweet, gentle baby.
The last 2-3 weeks of pregnancy were hard. I felt huge. My belly button had turned completely inside out 🤣 my feet and ankles were swollen, I could hardly roll over in the middle of the night nor sit up on my own. I was having this nerve pain down my upper thighs that was really sharp. This also caused a nerve rash down my thighs as well. I was often numb down my bum and legs because of my sciatic nerve. I had hemorrhoids that I knew weren't going away for a while! And oh, the heartburn!!
That last part was also difficult because I went past my due date and I always was expecting that she would come early. (My mothers intuition was wrong.) Because she came 2 days late! Which feels like an eternity in late pregnancy time.
BUT, despite all the difficult, I was so so grateful to be pregnant again and to get to have another GIRL 🥰 I had prayed desperately for this sweet little girl and heavenly father gave her to us. We all were so excited and our family was beginning to feel complete. I loved her already.
As my due date approached, I started losing faith. Did my body remember what to do? Was she going to be too big and not fit through my pelvis? Was everything okay? Would I be pregnant forever? All of these were my fears takin over but at the time, it felt a little hopeless. I prayed a lot and asked for added strength to endure. I also told my kids to stop praying that she be "healthy and strong" and start praying that she would come!
I tried walking A LOT, jogging, keeping up with my yoga exercises, bouncing on the bed, going off roading, drinking pineapple juice, being intimate with Malcolm, red raspberry leaf tea, and birth prep pills. I was starting to seriously consider acupuncture and castor oil if labor didn't start that next day!
Thankfully, at 12:30am on May 6th, I started feeling stronger contractions that actually hurt! It felt strange be excited about that but I was oh so ready. Was this the beginning of real labor? Would the contractions continue or subside?
I decided to try and get some rest and just see what would happen. The contractions were about 15 minutes apart and I could not rest so I decided to get up and finish packing up my bags and maybe get in the bath. But by the time I had packed up, changed my clothes, and grabbed a snack, my contractions were between 3 and 10 minutes apart.
3 minutes! That meant we needed to get to the hospital! It was 1:30am when I told Malcolm I thought it was time to go. He packed up and we headed out the door. My parents were living with us at the time and we that meant we didnt have to worry about where to take the kids. 😊
When we got in the Pathfinder, the gas light was on so we decided a gas stop would be a good idea. We also hit construction on the interstate and our exit was blocked off. We got off on another exit and GPS'ed our way through back roads to read the hospital. That's also when we stopped for gas and joked about the difference between your first and fourth babies and rushing vs. taking your time on the way to the hospital.
we finally made it and parked the car in the parking garage. We gathered our stuff and made our way to the entrance to find that all doors were closed during the nighttime except for the emergency department 🥴
So we got BACK in the car and drove over to emergency where we had to pay and have a valet park it for us. (Which Malcolm was highly annoyed with). lol After so many obstacles, we finally were able to make our way up to labor and delivery! Phew! By then, it was about 2:30am.
The receptionist nurse hurried me back as she discovered it was my 4th baby and my contractions had been as close as 3 mins apart. The strange thing was, my contractions were not consistent at all. I would go 3 mins apart and then 15 minutes apart. However, they were strong and productive.
The nurse checked me and concluded I was at a 6 and 80 effaced! Hooray! But how much longer? Those contractions were hurting. Could I get in the bath? Walk around? I hated being on my back in that bed. But my nurse wanted me to be tracked for a while. They asked if I wanted an epidural and I said yes. I was scared of what was coming and I didnt want to do it! And would it last a long time? Would she be big? Those were my biggest worries.
They got my IV in, monitored me and the baby, gave me a bag of antibiotics and by that point, my on call doctor showed up and checked me. I was an 8 and 100 effaced which means this baby could come anytime!
I finally said I wanted off of my back and I stood by the bed leaning over it. Malcolm naturally started pushing on my lower back and it helped tremendously! He also gave me a strong arm for counter pressure when I needed. He had set up my diffuser with oil and started playing James Taylor (Not Jim Hensen this time)! 🤣 He was the best birthing partner I could have asked for!
Leaning over the bed wasnt letting me rest so I used the CUB birthing companion and put it on the bed so I could lean over it. The cub is like a blow up seat with a cut out for your belly to fit in. I leaned over that and could rest between contractions. I could hold onto the bed rails for counter pressure while Malcolm pushed on my lower back. I was feeling intense contractions and pressure and I knew she was coming soon. But how soon? Would this last a long time? After about 3 really intense contractions, I felt the need to push. I felt her dropping and decided I could do this in one push or many so lets just get it done!
With that contraction, I gave a giant push and ALL of her came out. Head, shoulders body, everything, in one push/contraction. My first feeling was relief! We had done it! It was 5:34am. I had been in labor for only 5 hours from the very start to finish. I think what helped the end go so quickly was being in an upright position and using gravity and the right angle for her to descend. Much quicker than laying on your back!
I was annoyed with my nurses and doctors because they seemed to be on slow motion. I had been telling them I felt pressure but no one really got ready for birth. My doctor wasnt dressed and ready for it. No one really said anything to me. They just stood around. It was pretty impersonal and a little annoying but maybe thats because I was the one in labor!
Reagans oxygen level was low and they gave her oxygen to get it up. They rubbed her back and kept her under a warmer. She was so calm and barely made a sound. She got an 8/9 on the apgar scale. They said when babies come so quickly, their oxygen is usually low like that. The placenta was delivered and I asked for medicine right away. IBUPROFEN PlEase!!!
I had a 2 degree tear and got shots to get ready to be stitched up. Those shots arent fun. Neither is the stitching. Thats when I really start questioning why I dont have an epidural. After they stitched me up. (About half an hour). They count the gauze to make sure they have everything. They couldnt find some 😯 And started looking. They finally found it in the trash.
I still had barely even seen Reagan at this point and I'm wanting her now! I got my birth pause (little break after babys born) and now, "Where's my baby!?"
They gave her to me sleeping but then had to take her back as they started seeing how much I was bleeding. The nurse pushed (😭😭) on my abdomen to help my uterus clamp down and huge clots and blood gushed out. That first gush can be normal but the next time she did it, more clots and blood gushed out. And the next, and the next.
It started to become apparant that I was bleeding too much too quickly. They started tk weigh my pads and bed things to see how much blood I had lost. I went over the 500ml mark (which is normal for a vaginal delivery).
I heard them start talking about options. They decided a suppository that helps stop the bleeding would be good so they did that (fun.) And they continued to push on my uterus HARD every 15 minutes (more fun).
After that didnt work, they asked when the last time I emptied my bladder was. Before delivery but I couldnt remember exactly when. They didnt want me to stand up because that can increase the bleeding so they did a catheter (Even More fun). A normal bladder holds 300-500ml and mine had a whopping 800ml! What the. How did I not feel that? Maybe I'm used to feeling "full" and pregnant🤣 They said a full bladder can prevent the uterus from clamping down when it needs to so maybe that was the issue?
At this point, I asked Malcolm for a blessing. He didnt have oils but he did a quick, one handed prayer on my head asking that all would go well and the nurses and doctors would know what to do. I felt increased peace after the blessing.
The bleeding continued to increase. So, they upped my pitocin to the highest level and prescribed an extra bag. Still bleeding. They decided to give me a certain shot to stop the bleeding in my left thigh. Didnt stop. So they gave me a different shot in my right thigh.
Right before they gave the shots, they switched out my nurses. I now had the head nurse and a seasoned nurse both experienced in hemorrhaging. I heard them speaking frantically about what to do next. They were trying to act quick. They were much quicker than the previous nurses I had. When the bleeding still hadnt stopped after all of that, a doctor came and they talked to me about a manual procedure where he would reach up and manually clear out with his hand anything that might be left inside the uterus. If there was any placenta left, that could be the cause of my uterus not clamping down and stopping the bleeding.
My nurses warned me about the pain of this procedure but the need for it. They gave me meds to make me loopy to handle it better. I was scared and even plugged my ears when they were telling me what they were going to do. I kept thinking, "Dont tell me, just do it!"
I dont know if it was all the meds and tiredness I was feeling but the procedure wasnt as bad as I had anticipated. Phew. But still not fun.
Finally, my doctor who delivered showed up again and reassured me that they examined the placenta and all of it was intact. That would not be the cause of the bleeding.
All of this happened in about 2 hours. My blood loss had totalled over 900ml which was now officially considered a hemmhorage.
Finally, after all of this, the bleeding started to subside. They still continued to press down on my uterus and check my bleeding but they also let me rest. I was not able to get up until hours later.
It was exhausting and stressful but the worst was over. Could I see my baby now? Reagan had been sleeping under the warmer and Malcolm had been holding her here and there when he could.
Malcolm observed all of this next to me, patiently waiting for the nurses and doctors to do their thing. He would occassionally give me an "I'm so sorry" look but he also wasnt freaking out. He was calm.
The bleeding was under control and I got my baby. I was not expecting all of that to happen and I was so ready and grateful that I seemed to have the worst behind me. Regan was healthy and I was improving.
strangely enough, I didnt feel much cramping from all their medicine. What I felt cramping from THE MOST was when I nursed Reagan. Those cramps were INTENSE. And I wonder now if I had just been able to nurse her from the beginning, if that would have helped my uterus to clamp doen more than everything they did. Natures way is usually the best way 👍
We got moved to postpartum that late afternoon and everything went along well after that. (Just the typical postpartum aches and soreness).
I felt Heaven there with me through everything. I had a prayer in my heart the whole time and had the feeling like all would be well. I think that peaceful feeling is what helped keep my vitals steady during it all. My blood pressure never spiked or dropped. I know I had angels there helping that day.
